perfect word vomit

Disclaimer: this is honestly word vomit.  I didn't even try and proofread.

Today I realized just how much I have to be grateful for.  And I'm going to be incredibly honest about it.

Today I took the GRE, and it was honestly the scariest test of my life.  But I did GREAT.  I didn't do perfect, or even as well as I probably thought I was capable of, but I did really well, and I did well for the schools I'm wanting to apply to.  And all the while I got to learn an awesome lesson about humility: I don't have to be the best, I just need to do well enough to get me to the next step in my life.  So I can stop fussing about how I could have been better, and just focus on being good enough to learn what it is I need to learn.

In the temple today I met a girl who is pretty much me two years ago.  She's considering changing her major to psychology, and she has so many questions and so much confusion.  I chatted with her a little, but then had to leave.  It seemed silly and presumptuous, but I gave her a note with my email so that she could let me know if she had any more questions.  I honestly didn't think she'd email me, but tonight when I got home she had- almost immediately.  Turns out I was acting on inspiration as an answer to prayer.  Acting on faith does indeed lead to power.

I also realized today that I don't have to make big decisions yet.  I'm happy with what I'm learning, how I'm helping others, and the moments that I feel happy.  Tonight was one of those moments.  I got pretty, went to Five Guys with my awesome boyfriend, and laughed and danced and sang all the way to Smiths for delicious drinks (I'm officially a fan of IZZES- try the delicious drink without added sugar and with two whole servings of fruit!) and then back home.  I made a skirt from the dress I wore to my dad's wedding that was too short- and that was a lovely sort of catharsis in and of itself.  We watched LOST and had a real discussion about the ins and outs of torture and the idealist versus practical views of when the end justifies the means.  Fascinating- and I really love being able to expand my point of view with new ideas.

I'm at an awesome point in life.  I'm moving this week to a brand new apartment, where I get to live with people I love and make new friends while still keeping in touch with a ward I have great friends in.  I'm graduating from college here pretty soon, and I have a great resume, gpa, and test scores that will help me get into a top tier conflict resolution program.  I'm TAing for a class that I love, all while getting to totally revamp the curriculum.  Next week I get a chance to have an authentic interaction with my mother.  Tomorrow I get to play volleyball and start packing.  And I have beautiful opportunities to help build my future family in the distance.

There may be tons of things I don't know, questions I don't have answered, and concerns that haven't gone away...but I also have so many things I DO know, questions I DO know the answers to, and concerns that HAVE gone away.  I've learned so much recently, and I'll only learn more.  I am so blessed.  I can literally feel the power of heaven behind me.

And that, more than anything, is what I've been noticing:  when we act on faith, Heavenly Father gives us power.

http://vimeo.com/3508632  One day.  But until then, I thank you all so much for believing in me.  I believe in you.  (But I don't believe in Harvey Dent.)